It’s true. We’ve heard it all but a few comments are on repeat and they never mean what they are meant to convey. Whether you are fooling yourself or trying to pull the wool over our eyes, here are three things that make any experienced professional organizer wince in pain.

1. “I can take care of that later.” 

2. “Do you mind if I tweak that?”

3. “I don’t want to work that way. This is what I want to do.”

There is a universality to the organizing experience that I wasn’t expecting when I started 30+ years ago. I’ve worked with every profession you can imagine (including a world famous magician, movie stars and a few porn actors) and no one is completely out of the box unique. This should be a comfort to you. Your professional organizer has seen your mess before and is neither shocked nor into casting shame on you. We just want to help you divest yourself of the no longer needed and get whatever remains set up to serve you. I personally want your attention and time to go to fulfilling your life purpose not leaping over stacks of things or spending hours on a noble quest for a legal document you need tomorrow.

1. “I can take care of that later.”

   If this were the case, we wouldn’t be there in the first place. You are fooling yourself. And even if you have seen the light and can indeed now take care of the remaining steps of the project, do you have the time? Will you schedule completion on your calendar or leave it to a moment of inspiration? The issue here is that the need to have chaos can so easily return and instead of completing the project, the area returns to the comfort of ‘same old/same old.’ If, however, your organizer is set to return, do ask for homework! He or she will understand your strengths and weaknesses after a few hours and can tailor homework they feel certain you can master. Now you have created a working partnership.

2. “Do you mind if I tweak that?”

   We do mind. Live with our changes for 2 weeks to see how they feel then make all the tweaks you wish. Let’s look at a real world example of a pointless tweak.

   I went to visit friends for a few days when 9/11 happened and I became stranded for almost 2 weeks. I wanted to be helpful so I offered to organize a project for them. The husband was eager to have his closet done. His wife was not on board. We had a pow wow and I was given permission to go forward.

   Insecurity drives the need to be in control. For all her many accomplishments, the wife felt that only she understood her husband. When I completed his closet, she told me all the changes he would not like. I said that when he came home from work and viewed the project, I would be delighted to change anything requested. It’s always dicey when you organize without the client present so I was open to making changes that suited his personality. Let me add that I had known both of these people for over 25 years. I had a pretty good handle on the personalities involved and how they used space.

There was no waiting. She tore into the newly organized project and made changes that were far from the Zen Organized tm experience I had created. When we showed her husband the closet, she told him what I had done and how she had tweaked it. He took it all in and said: “Nothing Regina did would have bothered me but the closet is fine as it is.” He made his living as a therapist but could easily have joined the diplomatic core.

3. “I don’t want to work that way. This is what I want to do.”

The way you habitually work created the mess we’re working on. I have a great example. I worked with a husband who had been gifted with 5 hours of my time. He was as interested in my work as he was in flying to the moon strapped to a rocket. It was excruciating. I learned that day to never be gifted to anyone. The client has to be eager and on board.

The first project I tackled was his closet. We could make no progress. I explained I wanted to go through it item by item and remove whatever he no longer needed or wanted to use. No, he said, he wanted it all. Instead of a chaotic presentation, I wanted to put items in categories. Why create a situation where you have to wonder where a pair of slacks might be hiding when they could not only be grouped but organized by color? No, he said. when he wore an item he returned it to the front of the line. This way he cycled through everything … eventually. If things didn’t go together, he didn’t care. As you can imagine, we moved on.

Next we worked on his files. I use the phrase loosely. He had hanging file folders in a file box. He did not know about file tabs so his system was memorized. When he needed to file a paper or retrieve information, he had to remember the name and count. Yes, he remembered the placement of every hanging folder.

He had not understood that manila (or colored) folders go inside hanging folders. He found that pointless. I explained that if he took the material from several hanging folders and put them on his desk the papers could mingle. When he wanted to refile them, he’d have to sort through them creating unnecessary work.

This man, like the wife in the previous example, was incredibly insecure. Instead of being open to saving time, money & energy, they were married to ineffectual solutions simply because they had created them. If you trust your organizer, surrender to their experience and wisdom. Embrace the changes. If after two full weeks something truly bothers you have a chat with your organizer or make the change. Just be sure you understand your motivation!

Wonder what happened to the file ‘system?’ Interior folders were a bridge too far but tabes on hanging file folders were embraced. In fact he became almost childlike in his gratitude. He had truly never encountered them and thought I was brilliant. At least I made a small impact that day.

Rumi Knows

Are you curious as to what professional organizers love to hear? “I didn’t know it could be like this!” I do believe that is my favorite response. If you didn’t grow up in a home that was organized, you may have only seen it in magazines or on TV. The experience has eluded you. Now you realize the ease that has entered your life and how different your experience of dressing, cooking or driving into the garage will be. I can’t take your tears and gratitude to the bank but I can wrap myself in your surrender and be fulfilled. Rumi said it best:

Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life.”

One final note: I do not believe all organizers are created equal. Experience is a game changer but so is how the person is wired. Are they adept at teaching/mentoring a client? Are they compassionate by nature? Is transformation rather than control at the heart of their work ethic? It all matters. If you do not feel totally safe and heard end the session and find someone else. Above all NEVER allow yourself to be bullied. I hear stories from new clients all the time. “You’re so nice, Regina! My last organizer bullied me.” Never, ever accept such behavior from anyone but especially someone you are paying to assist you.

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Organizing Tips:

Most files today are kept on your computer with aniCloud back-up than are found in offices. I think that saves trees and I am all for it. There will always be material, however, that we choose to have on hand. For those files here are some superior products to help your set-up be productive & support you:

A box of hanging file folders will usually have a bag of tabs. The problem is they are short so you have no room to adequately name your files. Pick up a bag of extra long tabs and you'll be all set: File Folder Tabs, 100 Sets Hanging File Folder Labels 2 Plastic Tabs and Inserts for Hanging File Folders